He gets that from you
by AnonymousSparkle
Summary: A song fic using Reba McEntire's He gets that from you. Takes a look at Winona Kirks thoughts on Jim growing up and their relationship. It's Jimmy's birthday and it leaves the Kirk matriarch torn about how to feel.


_**AN: So, I totally wrote this ages ago and found it stored in the back corners of my computer. I'm not sure exactly why I never posted it. Just to warn you, it is not edited by anyone but myself and only really quickly so I apologize if there are any mistakes. I went off of my knowledge of Star Trek (which I believe to be pretty good) so if I made any mistakes please let me know. Hope you enjoy. I haven't posted anything in a long time and this is the first fic I've written in this category so feedback is appreciated.**_

Winona Kirk sat at the kitchen table, watching the sun beginning to come over the horizon. She didn't sleep well anymore and especially on days like today. It was Jimmy's birthday today; she needed to wallow in her sorrow now so that she might be able to offer her son some semblance of a smile later. A tear slides down her cheek and she wipes it away almost angrily. Winona Kirk prided herself on being strong and crying was not something she did often, though more now than she ever had before. She had to remind herself sometimes that he wouldn't want her to cry, to be sad. George would want her to live, to be happy. But, when you lost half of your heart, half of your soul, how did you do that?

Eventually the sun comes over the horizon and shortly after its arrival is the sound of bare feet padding down the hallway. She does not have to look up to know its Sam. Jimmy was never up this early. When he comes into the kitchen she offers him a smile over her coffee cup and kisses his forehead when he takes a seat next to her. Sam's eyes are watching her and she knows why. He knows what today is and had always been a perceptive child. He hadn't been very old when George had died, but old enough to remember his father. "Love you mommy" he says, offering her a smile that said a lot all at once. That he loved her, that he missed him too, that it would be alright.

"I'm going to go hang out with the boys this morning. They want to play ball. Is that ok? I'll be back later to spend time with Jimmy, I promise." He asks in an anxious tone, not certain of what his mother's reaction will be. Its clear he's looking for a distraction just as much as she'd love to look for one herself. She ruffles his hair and sighs. "You know your brother will want to see you Sam, don't be out all day."

With excitement he nods, grabs a granola bar and heads out the door. It got hot during the summers, so activities started early to beat the heat. With some effort, Winona forces herself out of the chair and starts cooking breakfast. It would be the only thing to get Jimmy out of bed.

_His early mornin' attitude  
>You have to drag him out of bed<br>Only frosted flakes will do  
>He gets that from me<br>Yeah,he gets that from me_

Sure enough, with the smell of bacon and eggs on the frying pan drove the young boy from his bed. The now 8 year old Jim Kirk came stumbling into the kitchen, stifling a yawn. She tips the eggs and forks a couple of strips of bacon onto a plate and sets it next to a bowl of frosted flakes. Just like her, he loved this old cereal whose recipe had lasted hundreds of years from its origin. There was so much about him that was like her. He was stubborn and strong; never backing down from a fight.

_His curly hair and his knobby knees  
>The way the sun brings those freckles out<br>Talk and talk never miss a beat  
>Yeah,he gets that from me<br>He gets that from me_

As Jimmy slowly wakes up over breakfast, he starts talking. Telling her animatedly about the dream he'd had the night before. Something about being in space, seeing all the stars up close. It was getting harder already to focus, to look at him. The sun shown just right, bringing out the exact same freckles she'd had as a child on his face. His hair still had the curl it he'd had as baby, just like her own, but it was starting to become straighter. Yes, so much of herself there. Still, he was looking more and more like George every day.

The last thing she wanted to do was ruin his birthday, but it was hard when the date was something that also made her want to mourn. Two every important things had happened on this date, and they defined her existence. It was like being pulled in two different directions.

_He looks at me with those big brown eyes_  
><em>He's got me in the palm of his hands<em>  
><em>And I swear sometimes<em>  
><em>It's just like you're here again<em>  
><em>He smiles that little crooked smile<em>  
><em>There's no denying he's your child<em>  
><em>Without him I don't know what I'd do<em>  
><em>He gets that from you<em>  
><em>Oh,he gets that from you<em>

"Mom? Are you listening?" His voice brings her back to earth and when she looks over a pair of bright blue eyes are staring right back. "Mom? I said I was going to go out for a walk…" Her youngest son is watching her closely, uncertain and she knows he knows. Jimmy is beyond smart…probably a genius though she hadn't the heart to put that to the test. If anyone caught on, it would only be one more difficulty in the boys life. It was bad enough he had the stigma of being the Kelvin child. No, she'd let them find out later. For now, Jim could be a kid with no worries about advanced classes and special testing. Yeah, he was just like his father….smarter than most and a cocky attitude because he knew it.

"You want to go out by yourself, on your birthday?" Winona asks and something in his eyes tells her it's the last thing he really wants but as he hops down from the kitchen stool and offers her a confident smile and nod she knows he's going to go anyway. And there's that smile…Georges smile. She knows this is Jimmy's gift to her, not asking her to shower him with attention all day.

_How he loves your old guitar  
>Yeah,he's taught himself to play<br>He melts my heart  
>Tells me he loves me every day<br>And cracks a joke at the perfect time  
>Makes me laugh when I want to cry<br>That boy is everything to me  
>He gets that from you<br>He gets that from you_

"I'll be back later Mom, you can dote on me all you want then." He promises and she laughs. Normally she'd be worried about him causing trouble but he always behaved himself on this day. It was like he knew she couldn't handle anything else on this particular day. A moment later he's heading out the door like his brother, but with a different item in hand; an old guitar. He was actually pretty good and if he kept practicing he'd out do his father. Suddenly, he pokes his head up by the kitchen window. "And Mom…I love you." He winks and then he's gone.

With both boys safely out of the house for a few hours Winona Kirk does what she does every year. She breaks her one rule, that she won't cry and she won't cling to his memory. Slipping into the bedroom she locks the door behind her and pulls out her favorite picture of him…of them. It was their wedding day and both of them had brilliant smiles, filled with joy. "George…you don't know how hard this is. You should be here…you should be here…" she mummers, an echo of what she had said that day. And she wishes he could see the son he'd died for...the one he'd given a chance and made the world safe for. Now it was her job to keep Jimmy's world safe. She gives a laughed hiccup. It was getting harder to control that boy too and his stunts weren't so innocent anymore. Always the rebel…less like her, more like George. She was stubborn, George was…he was always standing up for what he felt was right even if it meant bucking the system. Then again, that was her too in some ways. "You left me with a mess….and a son you'd understand better than I do…"

_Last night I heard him pray  
>Lord,help me and mama make it through<br>And tell daddy we'll be okay  
>He said he sure misses you<br>He sure misses you  
>He really misses you<br>He gets that from me_

That night, when the celebrating, kisses, hugs and birthday wishes are over, when she's ignored about a dozen calls from her friends and family because she knows it'll only make her more upset to talk to them and hear their worry, Winona stands in the hallway. Both boys were clean, in their pj's and had their hair and teeth brushed. It was over. Another year was gone.

Murmuring from down the hall draws her closer to the doors to her boys bedrooms. "Lord, I know I don't always behave myself but….if you're listening…please look after momma and Jimmy and me." She hears in Sam's soft voice. "Te—Tell daddy we're ok." And for the hundredth time that day she feels tears prickle at the corners of her eyes.

Another voice catches her attention. It's Jimmy. "Dad…I know she misses you. I'm sorry…I'm sorry you had to go. It might seem silly but, I miss you too." Something broke inside her, hearing the regret in his voice. As though this was his fault. Apparently he had gotten his proficiency at hiding emotions and thoughts from his dad too because she clearly hadn't hidden anything at all from him today.

Winona Kirk doesn't spend another birthday with Jimmy for ten years. Always the same excuse, a mission, an important meeting, people who needed her…anything so that she didn't ever have hear the regret in her sons voice or face that smile or those knowing eyes. He was better off without having to see her pain, at least that's what she told herself.


End file.
